Breaking News: Following on from recent research which suggests that everything has already been said and we are now just endlessly repeating the same things in different combinations a collaborative project between historians and physicists at the University of Birmingham, UK, has today announced that everything which could happen has already happened, and we are now just repeating the same things over and over again in different forms and combinations.
Asked about the apparent 'futility of all existence' revealed by these findings a spokesman for the group told a packed press conference "someone's already discussed that before, so what's the point? Let's just get drunk."
Buddhist groups were quick to jump on the findings as proof of the cycles of Karma and the need to escape into Nirvana by attaining enlightenment but observant critics have already pointed out that we are all one and all self is illusion, and as Buddha already attained enlightenment so have we, so its already happened, so what's the point? Let's just get drunk.
The project's sponsors, a well known brand of lager, struck a more positive tone, telling the assembled reporters that this was 'probably the best research in the world'.
..
(Editorial)
Breaking News: Everything Has Already Happened
Posted by TheDailyShadow (#2) 411 days ago (Editorial)Tweet
Who Voted for this Story
source: The Scientific Cartoonist
Please Do Not Look At This:
We Made These:
The Daily Satire is your source of the latest and most popular news satire, political humor, and other things that clever people like you find funny. Take a look around, you'll find loads of cool stuff from political cartoons to spoof news, funny memes and social satire. Open an account, or log in using facebook, and you can sumbit your own links, publish your own satirical articles, follow your favorite writers, and vote on the best funny news stories of the day to help us choose what to promote from our 'latest' to our 'popular' sections. Click the 'About The Daily Satire' Link above for more in depth information
animals
apocalection
apple
business
cameron
economy
education
election
entertainment
facebook
football
funny
god
gop
gop candidates
health
herman cain
humor
internet
law
mitt romney
music
news
newt gingrich
obama
olympics
parody
pictures
police
politics
religion
rick perry
rick santorum
ron paul
satire
science
sex
social media
spoof
sports
technology
television
the onion
tv
uk
us election
video
videos
world
2012