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Disney to purchase LHC

Posted by herewego 133 days ago (Editorial)

Anaheim, CA. The Disney Corporation announced today that it is to purchase the Large Hadron Collider from the CERN research institute, in an effort to create the worlds fastest theme park ride. The sale of the LHC, a 17 mile long underground particle accelerator, came about after the scientists working on it came to the conclusion that their research was pretty pointless and that most people wal.. VIEW STORY PAGE | (Editorial)

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Shark strike

Posted by herewego 134 days ago (Editorial)

Cape Town S.A. In an unprecedented display of carcharadon solidarity, the worlds entire population of great white sharks announced today they are withholding their co-operation with the Discovery channel in their
endless quest to fill the schedules with shark documentaries. Derdum Finn, an 18 footer from Seal Island and spokesperson for the sharks said ‘For many years now we have graciously ass.. VIEW STORY PAGE | (Editorial)

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This Crow Loves Sledging!!!

Posted by weirdoddtruenews (#9) 135 days ago (http://www.youtube.com)

This crow just loves his new toy - a little sledge which he made himself and uses on this rooftop whenever he gets time off from his busy job. I just love this - almost as much as the grinning fox using an abandoned conveyor belt as a slide which I wrote a post about before ( http://thedailysatire.com/weird-news/grinning-fox-uses-conveyor-belt-as-fun-slide-|-metro-co-uk/ )... VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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US Marines urged to limit enemy abuse to ‘shooting them in the face’

Posted by Imp (#5) 135 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

As the US Marines responsible for urinating on dead Taliban fighters were identified, observers have insisted that the abuse of enemy combatants should be limited to trying to kill them at every single opportunity.

The world was shocked by the images of marines ‘disrespecting’ the dead bodies of Taliban fighters, with some experts claiming that you should be nice to them as so.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Friday the 13th Went Without Hitch

Posted by Newsattack (#11) 136 days ago (http://newsattack.wordpress.com)

Today passed without mishap says everyone.

Doom mongers and fuckwits everywhere were confounded today when nothing out of the ordinary happened. No one was struck by a passing Albertross after having a black cat cross their path, no one had the bum stolen after walking under a ladder and no one had to listen to Justin Bieber after breaking a mirror.

Perennial knobjockey Shaun Tyler said "I .. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Samsung unveils television which can be upgraded for cost of new television

Posted by Imp (#5) 138 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Samsung claims to have put an end to expensive replacement televisions, by offering consumers equally expensive television upgrades instead.

The device is viewed by the manufacturing giants as a ground-breaking leap in being able to corale consumers into purchasing from the same company throughout the lifespan of advances in televisual technology.
A Samsung spokesperson conce.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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