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The week's top weird news stories.
Start celebrating the Diamond Jubilee early with the funniest ever pictures of Queen Elizabeth II.
A Daily Satire EXCLUSIVE! Government recruits spies from Poker tournaments...

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First Academy Awards Celebrates Best Actor In Blackface, Biggest Jew Nose | The Onion

Posted by TheDailyShadow (#2) 391 days ago (http://www.theonion.com)

The Onion reflects on Bette Davis’s film debut as a piece of chocolate cake, Lindbergh’s historic flight across the Atlantic Ocean after decades of disastrous test runs with dog pilots, and the opening of the first McDonald’s with a young Grimace just starting out as a cashier... VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Monarch living in luxury while subjects suffer hosts lunch for monarchs living in luxury

Posted by Imp (#4) 393 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

A lunch being held by the Queen at Windsor castle later today has attracted controversy after it was revealed that it would be hosted and attended entirely by monarchs who live in luxury while their people suffer.

The Diamond Jubilee lunch, in which guests will celebrate being born into opulence, will be attended by heads of state who display varying degrees of selfish greed.
The King of Bahr.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Asshole who missed out on Google IPO to try and get rich off of Facebook IPO | The Grindery

Posted by thegrinderydotcom (#23) 396 days ago (http://thegrindery.com)

"I'm going to hit it big this time," says local asshole, Gary Fulton... VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Olympic setback as Beckham blows out flame, makes wish

Posted by Imp (#4) 397 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Plans to carry a burning stick through Britain for all the proles to gawp at faced a setback today, after David Beckham assumed it must be his birthday.

While the Olympic flame has been accidentally extinguished in the past, it’s the first time such an incident has been marked with excited clapping, and demands for jelly and ice-cream.
Surrounded by people who eat canapés for a living, amongs.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Amazing Stories of Unlikely Animal Friendships | Web of Weird

Posted by wow (#10) 399 days ago (http://wow.thedailysatire.com)

These stories of unlikley animal friendships - from a fox and a cockerel, through a dog and fish, to a lioness and an antelope - will amaze you and probably make you go awwww. In addition to the stories there is also a collection of some of the best pictures of unlikely and unusual animal friends and a video that will blow your mind... VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Secret CIA waterboarding tapes reach top of Lovefilm chart

Posted by Imp (#4) 404 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Secret video tapes of CIA operatives torturing terrorism suspects have leapt to the top of the rental request chart, according to home movie supplier Lovefilm.

The latest figures show that 98% of all subscribers have expressed an interest in seeing the films in the near future, and certainly before they get sent a scratched copy of War Horse.
Lovefilm customer Simon Williams told us, “It was .. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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