Best Satire Stories For: sports/
Culture secretary Jeremy Hunt has welcomed the Olympic organisers’ announcement that ‘under budget’ now means ‘spending four times more than originally quoted and 75% of all contingency funding’.
From an original budget of £2.4bn, organisers say that keeping just 25% of the £2bn contingency fund on top of the already spent £7.3bn actual cost is a ‘proper result’.
Financial Analyst at LOCOG, S.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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England manager Roy Hodgson has urged the Liverpool players amongst his 23-man squad not to recapture the form that they showed last season as England prepare to face France in their opening match at Euro 2012 later today.
With England’s starting eleven expected to feature Glen Johnson, Steven Gerrard and Stewart Downing, and with striker Andy Carroll on the bench as a non-impact substitute, H.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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Fans of Blackburn Rovers are facing charges of animal cruelty after forcing a chicken to endure the humiliation of wearing a Blackburn Rovers football shirt.
The Chicken was subjected to the ordeal during yesterday’s game against Wigan, in which Blackburn were relegated to the Championship.
The chicken was eventually rescued by an RSPCA officer, who took the distressed bird for counselling wi.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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Police and Olympic officials have been searching for a battery of surface-to-air missiles that had been installed on London rooftops in order to safeguard the games.
It is thought that the missiles, or ‘Boris Bombs,’ were taken for scrap metal, the value of which has rocketed in the past year.
A resident of the flats below, Jed Ahmed said “there were some dodgy blokes with a lorry going up an.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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The same journalists who mocked England manager Roy Hodgson for his speech impediment were weminded today that many of them face pwosecution and a vawiety of pwison scenawios, many of which include bum-wape.
Wape is unfortunately vewy common in pwison and has been depicted in many films such as the Shawshank Wedemption and Amewican History X – a particularly wough one fwom behind that didn’t wea.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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Surface-to-air missiles could be deployed at five sites across London to ensure that any devastation caused by airborne terrorist attacks don’t affect the Olympic games, only the surrounding areas inhabited by people that don’t have tickets.
Exercise Olympic Guardian is being held this week to see if it is possible to stop a plane falling out of the sky by blowing it back upwards.
Defence Secre.. VIEW STORY PAGE |
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