Best Satire Stories For: uk,queen,benefits

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George Galloway’s Guide To Sexual Etiquette to be ready for Christmas

Posted by Imp (#4) 277 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Middle-aged men unsure how to control their penis can look forward to a Christmas stocking filled with helpful hints from George Galloway, publishers confirmed today.Hot on the heels of his clarification of the Julian Assange sexual assault charged, Galloway will now turn his attention to making sure men everywhere understand when it is acceptable to push forward to ‘insertion’.His pu.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Olympic opening ceremony to feature ‘fly-tipping and abandoned cars’

Posted by Imp (#4) 347 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

The Olympic opening ceremony will be inspired by the British countryside, and will feature a burnt-out Ford Mondeo and at least one abandoned fridge.Leaked details suggest the action will also include a train of twenty drivers angrily trying to get past a tractor on a narrow country lane.A cast of 10,000 volunteers will help recreate instantly recognisable scenes from the British countryside, inc.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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LOCOG announces word ‘Olympics’ will appear only in officially-licensed dictionaries

Posted by Imp (#4) 355 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Olympics organising committee LOCOG has courted further controversy by announcing a new sponsorship deal which will see the word ‘Olympic’ appear only in officially-sanctioned dictionaries.The move comes just hours after Visa were criticised for removing 27 ATMs around the London 2012 venue because they didn’t belong to them, an official sponsor.A LOCOG spokesperson said, “.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Other news given day off as BBC celebrates Queen’s Jubilee

Posted by Imp (#4) 355 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

All news stories that don’t involve the Queen floating down the Thames or people decorating their streets to resemble a BNP fun day have been given the day off by the BBC, as it focuses entirely on Diamond Jubilee celebrations.

Syrians are expected to spend the day pottering around doing a few odd jobs, while the global economy has revealed plans for a lie-in before catching up with the laundr.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Top 10 Funny Pictures of Queen Elizabth II

Posted by FunnyLists (#3) 373 days ago (http://funnylists.thedailysatire.com)

Here at The Daily Satire we are celebrating the Queen's diamond jubilee a bit early with a list of the top ten (plus one) best ever funny pictures of Queen Elizabeth II... VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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Katie Price divorce lawyer books Rolls Royce test drive

Posted by Imp (#4) 390 days ago (http://newsthump.com)

Katie Price’s divorce lawyer has reacted to the news of her latest engagement by pondering which leather trim would look best on the new Rolls Royce he will now definitely be buying later this year.Price announced her engagement to Argentinian model Leandro Penna, before insisting this one is for keeps, unlike all the other ones which were also for keeps.She told reporters, “I am in l.. VIEW STORY PAGE | OPEN LINK

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