REGISTER | LOGIN


Transcript:

Hi, thanks for watching my video featuring the funniest Obama jokes.
Did you hear the one about Obama winning the nobel peace prize? That’s right, that was a joke.
Did you know - Obama has sold more guns to the drug cartels than all of the other Nobel Peace Prize winners put together?
[meme image] -
Q. What's the difference between Barack Obama and a government bond?
A. The bond will eventually mature.

Obama claims that he has a balanced budget plan. It's exactly one half smoke and one half mirrors.

Q: Why is the Obama economy a system of checks and balances?
A: He writes the checks, you pay the balances.
Q: What's the difference between Lincoln and Obama?
A: Lincoln suffered from major depression. Obama caused one.

If Obama had half a brain, his butt would be lopsided.

Q: What did Obama say when he was told 3 Brazilians were killed in Afghanistan?
A: He asked Michelle "how many is in a brazillion?"
Barack Obama has started holding a weekly séance in the Oval Office.
So far, he has only managed to channel Jimmy Carter.

Q: What's the difference between Obama and God? A: God doesn't think he is Obama

Q: What is the difference between Obama and Jesus? A: Jesus can put a cabinet together

Q: Why did Obama have all sheets replaced in the White House?
A: He didn't want to be identified with anything muslin.
[meme]
The news that Barack Obama ate dog meat as a child inspired some of the best Obama jokes, such as:
What is Obama's Favorite Breakfast? Eggs Rover Easy

Obama's Favorite Burger? Quarter Pounder with Fleas

Obama's Favorite Vegetable? Collie Flower

In a related joke:
Barack Obama told Oprah Winfrey that he deserves to get a "good, solid B-plus" for his first year as President. He also claimed that Bo, the White House dog, ate the economy.

[meme] – inflation

Why does Obama’s presidency prove that America has finally put its racist past behind it? Because the country chose a black person to clean up the mess left by rich……oh.

Obama was leaving the country club golf course when he was accosted by an armed robber who demanded, "Give me all of your money!" Barack haughtily replied, "Do you know who I am. I'm the President of the United States!" The robber snarled back, "Then give me all MY money."

President Obama was visiting a school when he decided to talk to a little girl. The girl, who had just opened her book, closed in slowly and asked Obama “what would you like to talk about?

"Oh, I don't know," said the Obama. "How about What Changes I Should Make To America?"

"OK," she says. "That sounds interesting. But can I ask you a question first?

“Certainly” says Obama

“A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff - grass.” Says the girl “But a deer poos out little pellets, a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why is that?"

Obama, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence, thinks about it for a second and finally says, "Hmmm, I have no idea."

The girl nods sagely. “My daddy was right” she says, “you don’t know shit”.
.. OPEN LINK


Share on Tumblr


Who Voted for this Story



Featured Video:
We Made These:




The Daily Satire is your source of the latest and most popular news satire, political humor, and other things that clever people like you find funny. Take a look around, you'll find loads of cool stuff from political cartoons to spoof news, funny memes and social satire. Open an account, or log in using facebook, and you can sumbit your own links, publish your own satirical articles, follow your favorite writers, and vote on the best funny news stories of the day to help us choose what to promote from our 'latest' to our 'popular' sections. Click the 'About The Daily Satire' Link above for more in depth information
Username:

Password:

Remember: